The Shaadi Syndrome!!!
The younger brother finally said yes! Yes, to get married, much to the glee of our entire fairly conservative family. Mother breathed a sigh of relief. She was tense.. the boy was almost nearing 30. (What is it about the age of 30 that puts so much pressure on everybody to get married? I dunno) Dad decided to take it on him, to completely make sure his son gets hooked on in the best possible manner to the best possible option. Talking of options…..that brings me to the topic of this blog.. Options….
The first thing one obviously asks when somebody agrees to walk down the alter…“Is there someone special that you have in mind”… “Nay”, said the brother. Another round of relieved sighs, followed by smiles. God forbid, had the answer been an “aye” then everybody around would have seriously considered that a socially deviant and incriminating behaviour. In this case… Option one eliminated! Phew!!
Option two: Relatives… This perhaps is the best utility for relatives.. Both far and near ones… For on an issue like this each one is an equally important resource. You never know which disagreeable relative, might come forth with the most agreeable matrimonial liaison. Who doesn’t want to bask in the glory of ‘the-person-responsible-for-getting-them-together’ glow! In fact I happen to know few of my relatives, who do this job exceptionally well. The only way to elevate their social standing in the family is, by getting the young’uns in the family hooked up.
Option three: Marriage brokers… This category loves to call themselves social workers! Committed to provide marital bliss!! (does something like that exist??) In the golden yesteryears, the affable “family barber” used to take over this responsibility, before this lucrative business evolved to become a highly skilled profession,,. The only acceptable way of showing gratitude to their service is by expanding their current account! They are usually take over the “i-am-important” mantle at any successful ventures and hog maximum video and photograph footage!!
Option four: Matrimonial Advertisements… this is a relatively recent phenomena. Newspapers woke up to realize the potential of the marriage market and decided to eliminate the middlemen ( like the ones mentioned in the above two categories) by devoting whole pages to matrimonial advertisements, all of which surprisingly sound alike.. “Tall, fair, slim, beautiful, homely girl…” or “Well settled, tall, fair, handsome boy with 6 figure salary ….” The extremely low conversion rate of this particular medium still didn’t stop my parents from scourging through ads after ads each Sunday… circling the ones that sounded suitable.... although for the life of me I couldn’t understand how they could distinguish one ad from the other in terms of differences!
Option Five: ….Community welfare societies… These are made up of a group of paranoid beings from a specific community who feels that intercommunity marriages would eventually make their own community extinct! Hence in order to protect the entire community from the endangered-species list; they undertake community matrimonial service. The medium used could be various like.. community magazines, community “swayamvars” etc etc… These self proclaimed watchdogs of the particular community more often than not ends up creating marital discord than harmony.
Option six: The magic of the Internet::.. Matrimonial websites..think of a term associated with wedding and you are likely to find websites of the same name..shaadi.com, baraat.com, matrimony.com, vivaha.com, matrisearch.com, musalman.com, rishtey.com, khoj.com, doli.com…..etc etc. The list is endless. This particular medium does seem to hold some water.. b’cos here one actually sees the prospective grooms and brides with their contacts and pictures and in some cases even videos available!! Ahem !
After about three months of juggling around with various options and innumerable interactions with prospective girls.. My brother, (still very much single) is waiting for lightening to strike!! Did I hear somebody say marriages are made in heaven!!
The first thing one obviously asks when somebody agrees to walk down the alter…“Is there someone special that you have in mind”… “Nay”, said the brother. Another round of relieved sighs, followed by smiles. God forbid, had the answer been an “aye” then everybody around would have seriously considered that a socially deviant and incriminating behaviour. In this case… Option one eliminated! Phew!!
Option two: Relatives… This perhaps is the best utility for relatives.. Both far and near ones… For on an issue like this each one is an equally important resource. You never know which disagreeable relative, might come forth with the most agreeable matrimonial liaison. Who doesn’t want to bask in the glory of ‘the-person-responsible-for-getting-them-together’ glow! In fact I happen to know few of my relatives, who do this job exceptionally well. The only way to elevate their social standing in the family is, by getting the young’uns in the family hooked up.
Option three: Marriage brokers… This category loves to call themselves social workers! Committed to provide marital bliss!! (does something like that exist??) In the golden yesteryears, the affable “family barber” used to take over this responsibility, before this lucrative business evolved to become a highly skilled profession,,. The only acceptable way of showing gratitude to their service is by expanding their current account! They are usually take over the “i-am-important” mantle at any successful ventures and hog maximum video and photograph footage!!
Option four: Matrimonial Advertisements… this is a relatively recent phenomena. Newspapers woke up to realize the potential of the marriage market and decided to eliminate the middlemen ( like the ones mentioned in the above two categories) by devoting whole pages to matrimonial advertisements, all of which surprisingly sound alike.. “Tall, fair, slim, beautiful, homely girl…” or “Well settled, tall, fair, handsome boy with 6 figure salary ….” The extremely low conversion rate of this particular medium still didn’t stop my parents from scourging through ads after ads each Sunday… circling the ones that sounded suitable.... although for the life of me I couldn’t understand how they could distinguish one ad from the other in terms of differences!
Option Five: ….Community welfare societies… These are made up of a group of paranoid beings from a specific community who feels that intercommunity marriages would eventually make their own community extinct! Hence in order to protect the entire community from the endangered-species list; they undertake community matrimonial service. The medium used could be various like.. community magazines, community “swayamvars” etc etc… These self proclaimed watchdogs of the particular community more often than not ends up creating marital discord than harmony.
Option six: The magic of the Internet::.. Matrimonial websites..think of a term associated with wedding and you are likely to find websites of the same name..shaadi.com, baraat.com, matrimony.com, vivaha.com, matrisearch.com, musalman.com, rishtey.com, khoj.com, doli.com…..etc etc. The list is endless. This particular medium does seem to hold some water.. b’cos here one actually sees the prospective grooms and brides with their contacts and pictures and in some cases even videos available!! Ahem !
After about three months of juggling around with various options and innumerable interactions with prospective girls.. My brother, (still very much single) is waiting for lightening to strike!! Did I hear somebody say marriages are made in heaven!!
posted by Shibu | 1:13 PM
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